Sometimes I just say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing that I promised myself not to do in the past. It sucks to see yourself as such a weak person serious. I tell someone 'I'm sorry' but yet it wouldn't take long before it happens again, or probably something else to hurt the person. Have you ever felt this way?
I then I feel like I'm inadequate.
Which obviously sucks.
But my eyes are also turned back to God. I can never say that it's easy. Walking with Him is hard, sometimes getting harder as time goes by. But i can honestly say joy in Him increases day by day as well.
I can never have enough motivation, strength, courage to wipe away the tears I shes every now and then. It's too tiring to always try to please someone no matter how hard I try. Ok, probably trying too hard or trying the wrong way.
But really...I will never succeed without God. I'm not some 'holy facade'. Yes I'm a sinner, but I really hope to change from my ways and grow up to be someone whom God intends me to be.
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